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You're Not the Only You

by Matriarch

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1.
May I have this dance? Says the weeping lilac as I lay on church grass passing the time. You bought flowers I spent the hours staring into their lips. Take time, you said, an ended romance. Something not meant to last is wasting our time. I kissed your neck the day you met her, and I don't know what that makes me. A false sense of comfort in bed, and a bravado that anyone could see. You were not the love of my life. You were standing outside of the light. You were not the love of my life. You could never change my mind.
2.
February 04:43
It was February When you sat on my couch You cried while I told you a story And no one’s laughing now You didn’t listen to my warning Or maybe you did but you didn’t care You just gave me some boring excuse about how You had to get out of there And I wish I could turn back time But that’s not how this works So much to learn and so much to mourn I’m waving from the shore Watching you drowning Voluntarily Voluntarily Did he hurt you like I said Did he make you say things you never meant In the name of accountability Waiting for things to blow over eventually We are twisted together In some fucked up way And I never Thought I’d see the day (that) And I wish I could turn back time But that’s not how this works So much to learn and so much to mourn I’m waving from the shore Watching you drowning Voluntarily Voluntarily Voluntarily
3.
Why would you say that, I wasn't prepared for that heart attack that you dealt. I never knew that you could be so cruel, but I guess I should've expected it. And I don't know what you want from me. And I don't want to say please anymore anymore anymore anymore. What was it about her that made you wander, was I just some stupid little girl who could never change your mind? Am I crazy or am I fading into the background of the plotline of your life. And I don't know what you want from me. And I don't want to say please anymore anymore anymore anymore. And I don't know what to do without you. And I don't know what to say to make it any better. But still I know there can be worse weather so, who am I to say goodbye?
4.
West Prom 03:49
Walking through a park That smells like death And I’m just Trying to get my head straight. Trying to collect myself On a kinda cloudy Kinda sunny Day. Making space for upset feelings Coming to terms with All the things I Said I couldn’t say. They’ve never gone away. Maybe baby, maybe I still see you. Maybe baby, maybe I still hear you in the other room Sometimes baby, sometimes I gotta tell you I’m not over you I’ve been spending Half of my days Just trying to convince my Self that everything’s fine Rereading the books that I read When I was fifteen And I still had the Time Thinking about How to rip my spine out Or maybe I should just Say how I Feel out loud I’m not sure how. Maybe baby, maybe I still see you. Maybe baby, maybe I still hear you in the other room Sometimes baby, sometimes I gotta tell you I’m not over you You You You You You You You You
5.
You Know Me 04:05
You know me You know me That’s the way you hold me Crushingly Lovingly a brand of torture made just for me Ooh A steel toe Nothing left to show The ocean glass you chose to throw A morsel Of hope Savored on my tongue You know me You know me You know Know me What Is left to say The dog died yesterday Lighting A small flame Trapped in the attic For days You know me You know me You know Know me You know me You know me You know oh oh oh

about

A fuck you from the whole family.

credits

released July 1, 2022

Production, Mixing, Flute, Synth: Miles Foy
Rhythm Guitar, background vox: Mia Schaumburg
Lead Guitar: Alex Wall
Bass, lead vox: Libby Camp
Drums: Julian Lathrop

Mastered by Pat Keane.

Special thanks to Prism Analog, especially Nick and Ian. Extra thank yous to Aleena, Izzy, Erin, Alex's parents, Jessie, Chris, Garrett, Frankie, Miso, Toulouse (praise be!), and Gusteau.

much love.

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Matriarch Portland, Maine

@matriarch_haha

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